: DS9 "A ROSE..." PG (O/K) 1/5
From: hezromberg@aol.com (HezRomberg)

This is an alternate ending for "Sacrifice of the Angles." :)  Paramount owns
everything except this one scenario.  That's mine.  All mine.  Ha Ha.  I am
looking for feedback on this, please let me know what you think.  :)



"A Rose, by any other Name..."
By Heather Romberg


The Federation was celebrating on the Promenade, they had just retaken DS9...

	Odo rested quietly inside the bulkhead.  She was gone...the only member of his
kind to spend any time with him.  He wanted to hate her, desperately wanted to
think of her as the enemy, but he couldn't.  She had given him his first and
only true taste of what it meant to be a Changeling...and then yanked it away. 

He couldn't describe the pain he was feeling, it was worse than anything he'd
ever imagined.  He tightened his substance in an effort to stop the
uncontrollable shivering that plagued him...it was useless.
	Through the walls he could hear voices.  They were frantically trying to
restore power to the weapon systems, totally unaware he was there.  He
preferred it that way.  That way he wouldn't have to see that accusations in
their eyes.  "Traitor"...there was no other word for it.  Time ceased to matter
and he focused in on himself, hoping to control the awful pain...

Two Days Later...

	entatively, he attempted to shift.  He was definitely still sore, but he felt
*much* better.  *Hummm...I must have lost consciousness.*  Attuning his sensing
receptors to his surroundings, he suddenly remembered where he was.  *The
weapons array...*  In the heat of the battle for DS9, he'd abandoned the other
Founder and destroyed the station's weapon array...ten seconds too late. 
They'd still been able to destroy the minefield. <shudder> He'd failed her
again.  
	Withdrawal symptoms from the Link had been bombarding him in force and unable
to cope with the pain, he'd dragged himself into the bulkhead, wanting simply
to die.
	Feeling better now though, he slowly moved out his self-imposed prison.  There
was no one left in the weapons core and it appeared as though the explosion had
permanently destroyed all the equipment.  Looking at the destruction, he was
amazed he wasn't killed.  Still unwilling to face anyone, he took the form of a
small fly and left the weapons core.  He had to make sure she was all right.  

	Major Kira Nerys of the Bajoran Militia sat huddled on the floor in her
quarters.  The past two days had been the worst of her life, and that was
saying a lot.  Odo was dead.  They'd searched for hours after the Defiant
returned, but there was nothing left.  No one could have survived that
explosion.
	Even so, it took three security guards and a sedative to stop her from
continuing the search.  Sisko had ordered her to sleep, to allow herself to
recover...but it wasn't working.  There was a hole in her pagh, gaping and raw.
 She'd dealt with the death of loved ones so many times in her life she
expected to be almost immune to it's trauma.  But nothing had prepared her for
this.
	They had become so much closer in the long war months.  If it hadn't been for
him, she was certain she'd have gone insane.  The mere sound of his voice had
been soothing effect to her.    *I'd give anything to hear that voice again.* 
It wasn't until that Founder bitch showed up that they had any problems. Odo
had been pulled away from her little by little, until there wasn't much left of
the man she lo........*yes loved.  Why can I only admit it to myself now?*  
	She swallowed hard forcing back the flood of grief that threatened to consume
her.  He'd saved them all in the end.  By blowing up the weapons core he
ensured the Emissary safe passage into the wormhole, and thereby helped him
secure the help of the Prophets.   Pylar Aren reminded her at the joint
memorial service that the Prophets had a plan for everyone, and that Odo was a
vital part of their redemption of Bajor.  It should have helped...but it
didn't.
	She unclenched her fist, her fingers stiffly rebelling at the constant
tension, and glanced down at the only thing of his they'd been able to
recover...his half-melted comm badge.  She'd been holding it tightly since
she'd found it, afraid to let go.  Once she did, he'd really be gone.  She
rubbed her fingers over the metal, and felt the tears start to fall.  *Oh,
Odo...I forgive you for going with the Founder...but I'm not sure I can forgive
you for dying.*
With that thought, her grief pushed it's way past the final barrier and poured
forth, overwhelming her.


	Odo flew onto the Promenade, hoping to gather some information...it didn't
take long. A Plyar was holding an impromptu service outside the Temple,
joyfully preaching the redemption of the Prophets. He'd been surprised to see
all the Star Fleet officers were back, as he'd assumed they'd lost the battle
once the minefield was destroyed.  Well, at least he now knew what happened to
the station.  Odo gave a small, silent fly sigh, glad that his people hadn't
been successful.  It made the guilt that plagued him a little less sharp.
	He turned and flew above the crowd, looking for any sign of the one person he
needed to see.  She was no where in sight, but he did see Dax and Bashir
sitting solemnly at a table in Quark's. He flew to a ledge near by to listen.
	"I'm really getting worried, Julian.  She's acting like nothing ever happened,
but I know she's torn up inside.  She hasn't slept since we got back and she
won't let go of that damn comm badge.  I tried to take it from her once, and
she almost hit me!"  She shook her head and took another sip of her drink.  "I
think it may be time to intervene."
	Bashir sat back in his chair glumly rubbing his eyes.  "I had Sisko order her
to sleep for at least twelve hours.  She went to her quarters, but I'm not sure
I trust her to actually sleep."
	Dax leaned forward to add more damning analysis.  "Did you see her at the
memorial service?  She was acting as though she felt nothing!  You know that's
not true!  She was closer to Odo than anyone." 
	Odo almost lost control of his shape when he heard that.  A memorial service? 
For him?  They thought he was dead?  Then the rest of her comment sank
in...Nerys didn't care.  The pain that surged though him was more than he could
bear. He had to get away; he couldn't face this anymore.  *Perhaps being dead
is the best thing after all.*

Three Months Later...
	
	"Dax, do you see that power surge in the reactor grid?  What's causing it?"
	"You're avoiding my question, Nerys.  It's only dinner.  What could it
possibly hurt?  Will's a lot of fun, and Worf's known him for years."
	Kira groaned under her breath.  "I don't know.  I suppose I had enough of his
*twin* the last time."
	Dax rolled her eyes.  "Oh, come on, that's not fair!  Will isn't responsible
for what Tom did.  He is one of the most respected officers in Star Fleet. 
Besides, I'm not suggesting that you marry the man, just have dinner with him
at my quarters." She smiled her patented Dax smirk.  "What you do with him
afterwards is your business."  
	Kira grabbed a padd and moved to make a hasty retreat.  "I'll think about
it...really.  Now, I need to track down that power sur..."
	Dax reached over and grabbed her arm, forcing the determination on her face to
soften into a pleading look.  "Please, Nerys.  I need to have someone else
there.  I don't want to hear Will and Worf reminisce all night."
	Kira forced down the anger that threatened to surface, and managed a weak
smile.  "Okay, okay...I'll be there.  But don't forget, I'm just doing this
because you're my friend."
	Dax smiled triumphantly.  "You won't be disappointed, Nerys.  I promise."
	Kira rolled her eyes and mumbled a "right" as she moved to the turbo lift. 
She was sure there was a power surge somewhere on the station.  She just had to
find one.
	Dax waited until she was out of sight before she allowed her face to fall into
a worried frown.  Kira had improved some over the past three months, but she
was still suffering terribly. She'd lost weight, she rarely went off duty
unless Sisko ordered her to, she ate sparingly and socialized even less.  She
wasn't even argumentative anymore and she NEVER spoke of Odo.  In fact, she
left whenever someone else did.  
	She turned and favored her new husband with a knowing look.  Worf returned her
gaze with a sad little shake of his head.  He was in agreement, but there
wasn't much they could do.

	Will Riker smiled warmly as he leaned back in his chair. "Worf, Jadzia, I must
say this is the best Klingon meal I've ever had."  He tipped his mug of blood
wine in their direction.
	Kira raised her eyes from her plate where she'd been absently toying with her
food, and gave a belated second to the motion.  Riker leaned forward and placed
his bearded chin on his hand as he observed the quiet woman across from him. 
"Tell me, Major.  Are all Bajoran women born lovely, or have I just been
blessed with meeting the select few?"  He smiled at her, his eyes laughing.  It
was hard not to smile back.
	"You'd have to tell me, Commander.  I'm afraid, I've never paid much attention
to the subject."  A small glint of mischief caught her eye.  "I hear, however,
that you are something of an expert."
	Riker let out a sort blast of a laugh and refilled her mug as the others
chucked.  "I hope you won't hold it against me if I say that in my vast
experience, you are definitely among the top percentile."
	Kira smiled as graciously as she could at the gratuitous compliment.  He meant
well after all, and he was a nice man...*handsome too...*  She shook the
offending thoughts from her mind and took a deep drink of her wine, it's bitter
taste restoring her mood.
	Dinner continued for another agonizing hour as Worf and Riker regaled them
with tales of the Enterprise.  Finally, when she thought she was going to have
to find some excuse to leave her comm badge chirping startled her.  She cleared
her throat.  "Kira here."
	"I'm sorry to disturb you, Major, but you asked to be informed when Agias Fal
come back to the station.  Well he's in Quark's now.  Do you have some reason I
should detain him?"
	Kira fought down the urge to bark at the man.  No matter how much she disliked
him, it wasn't his fault he took Odo's job.  She swallowed before speaking. 
"No, he hasn't done anything.  Thanks for the information.  I'll take it from
here."  She stood and motioned to the group.  "I'm really sorry I have to cut
this short, but this is rather important." She nodded to Riker.  "It was a
pleasure meeting you, Will.   I hope we'll see each other again."  He stood,
smiling and took her hand gently in his.  "Count on it, Nerys."  She endured
the touch and turned to face Worf and Dax.  "Dinner was great as always. 
Thanks for having me over."  
	Dax walked her to the door and after a few more pleasantries she managed to
escape with a sigh of relief.  Tugging at her unfamiliar civilian clothing, she
made her way to Quark's.

	
	Odo watched her enter Quarks from his usual spot.  He lifted his glass and
absorbed more of the liquid to conceal his reaction.  He'd been back two weeks
now and the sight of her still caused a rush of pleasure to run through him. 
He'd missed her so much.
	For two months he'd wandered the colony worlds, changing shape at each new
location and blending in with the crowd.  It was one of the gifts he'd received
from prolonged linking with the other Changeling.  He could now represent a
humanoid flawlessly.
	It was a strange experience to be someone new.  He could create whatever
personality, face or background he wanted to.  It was very liberating, and yet
even more lonely than before, if that was possible.  Finally, after agonizing
over the events of his last week at Terok Nor he came to a conclusion.  He
couldn't be away from her.  He needed to make sure no one hurt her or did
damage to the only home he'd ever known.  He needed to be on DS9.
	But, this time no one would know.  He would simply blend in here as he had
elsewhere.  So far it was working marvelously.  He'd taken a job on a docking
crew and spent the days moving freight.  It wasn't challenging work, but it
gave him good cover and it wasn't physically difficult.  The heavy crates
weighed nothing to a Changeling.
	As usual, Quark's was the center of information on the station. He'd picked up
on all the local gossip simply by spending a few hours there each night.  It
also afforded him the opportunity to observe the criminal element more closely.
 He supposed he'd never lose his drive for justice.  He just had to be less
direct in his efforts now.
	He sat up a little as he saw her take a seat next to Agias Fal. *Why is she
talking to him?*  Agias was a notorious "privateer."  Unfortunately, he never
seemed to make mistakes, and Odo'd never been able to pin anything concrete on
him.  Just the same, everyone knew what he did and that he was a very dangerous
man.  *What would she possibly want with him?*  He picked up his glass and
slowly pushed his way to a closer table, attuning his hearing to their
conversation.
	"I need you to do something for me, Agias."
	The seedy Bajoran eyed her with suspicion.  He leaned back and took a long
draw of his drink, dribbling some onto his ragged beard, and then roughly
wiping it off with his sleeve.   "Now, this is a surprise, Nerys.  Miss 'I
don't do those things anymore' comes crawling back to the low class thug for
help."  He finished with a sneer, slammed his glass down on the table and
shouted for another drink."
	Kira swallowed angry retort and spoke quietly.  "I'm sorry you think that,
Fal, but this is really important to me.  Now, I can pay you.  Are you willing
to help me or not?"
	He stared at her for a few long moments, assessing her resolve.  "If this is
trap..."
	Kira shook her head sharply.  "I swear to you, Fal, this is not a set up.  I
may not approve of your...methods, but I'd never turn in a fellow resistance
member."
	He smiled devilishly, his eyes betraying the hidden intelligence that had kept
him one step away from the law.  "I'll believe you...for now.  Just remember, I
don't do favors for free, no matter who is asking."  He paused to let that sink
in.  At her lack of protest, he continued.  "So, what do you want me to do?"
	"I need you to go to the Heria system and get some data records for me."
	Agias leaned back with a frown.  "Data records?  Why don't you just ask them?"
	She shook her head.  "They won't hand out passenger or shipping records.  It's
some sort of privacy law.  I need you to download all the ship passenger lists
and manifests for the past three months."
	He leaned forward again, keeping his voice low.  "Are you crazy?  That's a lot
of data, and the Heria aren't what I'd call open and hospitable.  Do you know
what they do to thieves?  What are you looking for anyway?"
	Kira weighed whether or not to tell him anything, but decided she had no
choice.  "Three months ago, a friend of mine went missing.  He's probably dead,
but since we couldn't find any remains, I want to make sure he isn't wandering
around out there.  Most of the ships that left here the first week after Star
Fleet came back went to the Heria System. They were the only ones equipped to
handle repairs and re-supply."
	"You really are crazy.  This person is supposed to be dead, and you want me to
risk my life on some fluke of a chance that he may be alive and hiding out
somewhere?  Forget it, Nerys.  I say if they guy is wants to get away that
badly, let him go."  He chuckled.  "Life sure is strange.  I never figured,
'Nerys the Serious' would do something this stupid over a man."
	Kira glared at him, quickly losing her reign on her temper.  "I've agreed to
pay you, Agias.  You never seemed concerned about your safety before as long as
the payoff was high enough. Are you interested or not?"
	His smile faded and he stood up, gathering his tattered coat with one hand. 
"Sorry, Nerys.  I'd like to help you out, but I don't do suicidal things for
anyone."  He leaned over, his face next to her's.  She had to force herself not
to recoil at the stale scent of his breath.  "I think you should just forget
this mysterious man of yours."  He leaned even closer.  "If it's love you're
looking for..."  Kira pulled away sharply and shoved his face backwards.  He
chuckled at her, completely unfazed.  "Well at lease some things never change."
 With that he walked away and wrapped his arm around a dabo girl across the
room.  Kira sank down in her chair and drank the rest of her drink in one
swallow.
	Odo tried to hold back, but he simply couldn't stop himself.  He had to
prevent her from doing something even more rash.  Slowly, he moved to stand
next to her, clearing his throat to get her attention.  "Excuse me, ma'am.  I
think I may be able to help you."
	Kira looked up, startled at the unexpected visitor.  He was obviously one of
the station's hundreds of dock workers, dressed in rough, drab work clothes.
His were at least clean though and free of rips.  He had short, dark, brown
hair, and deep-set green eyes.  His face was unremarkable.  It was lined a
little with age and hardship, but it wasn't worn or marked.  He stood about ten
centimeters taller than she did and the rest of his build was equally
unremarkable.  Overall, he was about the most average Bajoran she'd ever
seen...and yet there was something about the eyes...the expression seemed
familiar, if only she could place it...She swallowed her thoughts and motioned
the odd man to the seat across from her.
	He sat down gingerly, looking at her in small glances, but unwilling to make
full eye contact.  "I'm sorry to have eavesdropped on your conversation, but
you appeared to need help."  He motioned to Agias across the room.   "That man
is not to be trusted."
	Kira nodded, her defenses fading as fatigue settled over her.  "What do you
mean you can help me, Mr....?"
	"Dren. Dren Ital."
	Kira frowned.  "Ital?  That's an unusual name."
	He nodded dismissively.  "Yes, yes.  It's an old style name from the Rekanta
hill country."  She seemed to accept that, so he continued.  "I know how to get
the data you're looking for."
	Kira leaned forward.  "How?"
	Odo leaned away from her, afraid of drowning in her deep brown eyes, his mind
racing to come up with a convincing story.  "My associates would prefer to
remain anonymous, but I assure you there will be no problem, and little
danger."
	He could see her skepticism and fear kicking in.  After all, he was a
completely unknown quantity.  "You're going to have to give me more than that,
Mr. Dren.  I have no way of knowing if you're trustworthy or not.  I also,
don't want to get involved with any really bad peop..."
	He raised his hand to stop her.  "Don't worry, the people I'm talking about
aren't affiliated with any known criminal element.  They simply...facilitate
data transfers for select...deserving customers."  He was really stretching
believability here, but he couldn't think up anything better while he was
constantly being distracted by her presence.  He silently thanked Chief O'Brien
for giving him all those old Earth detective novels.  They were full of this
sort of thing.
	Kira leaned back in thought.  She really needed that information and was
running out of options. She'd never be able to truly put this behind her until
she found out for sure.  Besides, there was something about this man that made
her feel at ease.  She couldn't explain it, and was too tired and desperate to
try.  "What assurances do I have that if you fail, this won't lead back to me?"
	Odo's mind raced as he tried vainly to come up with a suitable answer.  "We'll
exchange nothing until I succeed.  That way there's no way to trace it back to
anyone."
	"Fine. How long and how much?"
	Odo stroked his chin in fake contemplation.  He certainly hadn't expected her
to accept so quickly.  This was incredibly dangerous.  He could be anyone. What
was wrong with her?  He cleared his throat.  "I can have the data in about a
week.  As for payment...I can see that you need this for...personal reasons,
and I make it a habit not to gouge people when they're down.  I'd have to
say...20 bars of latinum."  
	He sat back to allow her to consider the offer.  20 bars was about 6 months
salary for her, but he didn't want to make her suspicious with an incredibly
low offer.  Besides this way he could haggle.  She looked down at the table for
a moment, and then reached across the table to shake his hand.  "20 bars upon
delivery.  If anyone asks about this, I'll deny everything."
	He nodded, weakly and stood with her.  "I'll let you know when I have it." 
She nodded again and then quickly left the bar, not even bothering to look
back.  Odo's eyes followed her until she was out of sight. Something was very
wrong.

	Kira walked straight to her quarters, her head buzzing and feeling generally
off center.  What she'd just done could cost her her career.  She sat down on
the sofa, heavily and dropped her head into her hands.  Prophets, she wished
she could just forget all this.  All she wanted to do was go back to normal, to
feel sure of herself again.  
She leaned over, laying down on the sofa and pulling her legs up into a fetal
position.  If she could only stop thinking about it...Exhaustion finally
claimed her as she reassured herself that she'd had no choice about hiring that
man.  She HAD to know for certain. Maybe then she'd get some sleep.

	Odo moved through the deserted hallways of the Habitat ring.  The hour was
late and most of the day shift was already asleep.  He needed to regenerate
badly, but he didn't feel ready to go back to his small quarters yet.  
	He'd rented one of the small, interior rooms that DS9 offered for it's poorer
workers, but at least he could be alone.  He had little in the way of
belongings and the small room suited him just fine.  Tonight was different
though.  His old quarters used to be two doors down from Nerys's on the command
level.  It always made him feel good to be so close to her.  It gave him a
sense of security.  But now, he was four decks away on the opposite side of the
station.  
	And she was hurting, because of him.  Part of him enjoyed a perverse pleasure
knowing she was so affected by his death.  It meant she cared much more for him
than he'd thought she did.  He berated himself every time that thought came up
though.  It tore him up to be the cause of her suffering, and he was really
beginning to worry about her.  She was not the strong, confidant woman he'd
always known.
	He gave a small sigh and headed towards his quarters.  He had to regenerate. 
Then perhaps he could come up with a solution to this problem.

	Two days went by as Odo carefully created the data that he was going to sell
to Nerys.  He watched her go to and from duty, making sure she wasn't getting
impatient and taking the matter into her own hands.  He couldn't risk that. 
Finally he had what was a reasonable approximation of the shipping records
she'd requested.  Any mention of a shapeshifter was missing of course.  It
wouldn't make her stop her search, but at least it would keep her away from the
Heria system.  He waited until she entered Quarks and then silently caught her
eye, motioning her over.  
	She waited a few minutes then lazily moved over to his table.  "You have it?"
He nodded and passed her a data crystal.  "I think this is what you wanted."
She held onto the crystal tightly and pierced him with a glare.   "How do I
know this is genuine?"
	He shrugged.  "You don't.  But if you cross check it with other information,
it will be correct."
She paused for a long minute, sizing him up. "I'll pay you once I've verified
its accuracy."
	He nodded acceptance, returning her stare with his long practiced
"investigators glare."  It worked as always and she lowered her gaze.  He
forced back a smile.  "That'll be fine.  You can find me here."
She moved to leave and in a gesture that surprised even him, he reached out to
clasp her arm.  "Ah...what are you looking for...if I may ask?  Perhaps I can
help."
	She looked back at him skeptically.  "Why would you want to?"
He forced the panic from his mind.  *Think!*  "You...you seem to need
it...besides, you remind me of someone I once knew."
	Kira looked deeply into his eyes trying to see what his ulterior motive was. 
But again, there was something there that made her trust him.  *What is it
about him?*  "That's nice of you to offer, but you don't even know me."
	Odo motioned her to the chair opposite him.  "I know, but I have a sense about
people, and right now, it's telling me that you need help."
	Kira leaned back in thought.  She didn't want to tell everything to a
stranger, but she couldn't talk to any of her friends about this.  They already
thought she was going crazy.  Even Dax's expressions were filled with pity
these days.  *What the hell, what do I have to lose?*  She took a deep breath
and began to talk.

	Two hours later, she was still talking, only now she was relating a humorous
story of how Odo had apprehended a couple of Deltan criminals.  Odo watched her
face, his entire being filled with joy. He'd really missed just watching her. 
Her whole face lit up with expression when she spoke.  He was also delighted to
hear some of her impressions of him.  He'd had no idea she saw him that way,
why he almost sounded invincible.  
	He drew his thoughts back to the present as she took on a sad expression and
her eyes filled with moisture.  He quickly handed her a napkin and she roughly
brushed away the offending tears.  "Sorry...sometimes it just hits me...and I
realize he's gone."
	Odo impulsively reached out and clasped her hand gently.  "That's okay.  It's
really hard to loose someone you care about like that.  I know.  I lost someone
I loved very much once, and it was all I could do just to continue living.  I'm
glad I did though...things have a way of turning out alright."
	She sniffled twice and squeezed his hand once before letting it go.  "Thanks
for listening to me babble on like that.  Most of my friends have decided I'm
on the verge of mental breakdown and they offer all sorts of 'helpful' advice."
 She smiled weakly and then stared at the data crystal in her hand for a long
moment.  "I'm not going to find anything on this am I?"  She took in a shaky
breath.  "He really is dead and I'm just chasing shadows."
	Odo grasped both hands this time and forced her to look him in the eye.  "From
what you've said, I really don't think there's any chance."  He paused trying
to find the right words.  "I'm sure he would have appreciated your vigilance,
but perhaps now a better tribute to him would be to just let him go.  From what
you've told me, I'm sure that's what he would've wanted."
	A couple of tears rolled down again and she wiped them away absently.  "I
suppose you're right."  She said softly.  They sat silently for a few more
minutes and then finally, Kira cleared her throat, stood and faced him with an
almost normal expression. "I think I actually feel a little bit better.  Thanks
for listening."
	He stood also and smiled.  "It was my pleasure.  It isn't often I get the
company of a lovely lady."
	Kira blushed a little at the compliment.  "Well...thank you...um listen, I can
pay you now if you like.  Anyone who'd listen to me drone on for two hours
isn't likely to have cheated me."
	Odo shook his head.  "That's not necessary.  It didn't cause me any trouble
and I'd feel like a Ferengi if I took your money."
	Kira stared at him, surprised.  "No, I fully intended to pay you for this.  I
can't let you just...give it to me..."
	Odo shook his head again.  "Please, Major.  That woman I told you about?  The
one I loved? Well, I let her down once and I was never able to make it up to
her.  Doing this for you would make me feel better."
	Kira opened her mouth to protest, but after a moment, simply closed it and
smiled.  "Okay...if you insist."  She smiled again and moved to walk away, but
he caught her arm again.  
	"There is one thing you could do for payment though."  She looked back at him,
suspiciously and he continued.  "Promise me that if you feel the need to look
further, that you'll come to me for help before you do anything risky.  I have
connections that might be able to make things easier."
	Her face relaxed and she touched his arm gently.  "Okay, okay.  I promise." 
She laughed a little.  "Who are you anyway?  One of those guardian angles in
Terran mythology?"  
	He feigned ignorance.  "Who?"
	She laughed again.  "Never mind. Just don't get caught having lunch with the
station's Doctor.  He forces you to read Terran literature."
	Odo chuckled in return and watched as Kira left the bar.  Once she was out of
sight he allowed a big smile to cross his face for a moment, then realizing
where he was, quickly left and headed for a secluded portion of the Promenade. 

	He hadn't felt this good in months!  Sure he 'Odo' wasn't in her good graces
but at least he could spend some time with her.  He hadn't expected to ever do
that again.  And this was SO much easier than it was when he was the Constable.
 He could be as open and friendly as he wanted to and no one would think a
thing of it.  He had no 'reputation' to maintain or limit him.  It was very
refreshing.
	He forced himself to calm down.  He had to be careful.  If he got too close,
someone would eventually see through him and he couldn't let that happen.  No. 
He'd just see her from time to time and enjoy his new found anonymity.  
	He looked at the chronometer on the wall.  It was late, but he was too happy
to go back to his quarters yet.  Instead he moved towards the engine room and
his favorite thinking place.  This was definitely an evening worth thinking
about.



COMMENTS???




"A Rose, by any other Name..."  PART II
By Heather Romberg


        Kira walked straight to her quarters, her head buzzing and
feeling generally off center.  What she'd just done could cost her her
career.  She sat down on the sofa, heavily and dropped her head into her
hands.  Prophets, she wished she could just forget all this.  All she
wanted to do was go back to normal, to feel sure of herself again.
        She leaned over, laying down on the sofa and pulling her legs up
into a fetal position.  If she could only stop thinking about
it...Exhaustion finally claimed her as she reassured herself that she'd
had no choice about hiring that man.  She HAD to know for certain. Then
maybe she'd get some sleep.

        Odo moved through the deserted hallways of the Habitat ring.
The hour was late and most of the day shift was already asleep.  He
needed to regenerate badly, but he didn't feel ready to go back to his
small quarters yet.
        He'd rented one of the small, interior rooms that DS9 offered
for it's poorer workers, but at least he could be alone.  He had little
in the way of belongings and the small room suited him just fine.
Tonight was different though.  His old quarters used to be two doors
down from Nerys's on the command level.  It always made him feel good to
be so close to her.  It gave him a sense of security.  But now, he was
four decks away on the opposite side of the station.
        And she was hurting.  Because of him.  Part of him enjoyed a
perverse pleasure knowing she was so affected by his death.  It meant
she cared much more for him than he'd known.  He berated himself every
time that thought came up though.  It tore him up to be the cause of her
suffering, and he was really beginning to worry about her.  She was not
the woman he'd always known.
        He gave a small sigh and headed towards his quarters.  He had to
regenerate.  Then perhaps he could come up with a solution to this
problem.

        Two days went by as Odo carefully created the data he was going
to sell to Nerys.  He watched her go to and from duty and made sure she
wasn't getting impatient and taking the matter into her own hands.  He
couldn't risk that.  Finally he had what was a reasonable approximation
of the shipping records she'd requested.  Any mention of a shapeshifter
was missing of course.  It wouldn't make her stop her search, but at
least it would keep her away from the Heria system.  He waited until she
entered Quarks and then silently caught her eye, motioning her over.
        She waited a few minutes then lazily moved over to his table.
"You have it?"
He nodded and passed her a data crystal.  "I think this is what you
wanted."
She held onto the crystal tightly and pierced him with a glare.   "How
do I know this is genuine?"
        He shrugged.  "You don't.  But if you cross check it with other
information, it will be correct."
        She paused for a long minute, sizing him up. "I'll pay you once
I've verified it's accuracy."
        He nodded acceptance, returning her stare with his long
practiced "investigators glare."  It worked as always and she lowered
her gaze.  He forced back a smile.  "That'll be fine.  You can find me
here."
        She moved to leave and in a gesture that surprised even him, he
reached out to clasp her arm.  "Ah...what are you looking for...if I may
ask?  Perhaps I can help."
        She looked back at him skeptically.  "Why would you want to?"
        He forced the panic from his mind.  *Think!*  "You...you seem to
need it...besides, you remind me of someone I once knew."
        Kira looked deeply into his eyes trying to see what his ulterior
motive was.  But again, there was something there that made her trust
him.  *what is it about him?*  "That's nice of you to offer, but you
don't even know me."
        Odo motioned her to the chair opposite him.  "I know, but I have
a sense about people, and right now, it's telling me that you need
help."
        Kira leaned back in thought.  She didn't want to tell everything
to a stranger, but she couldn't talk to any of her friends about this.
They already thought she was going crazy.  Even Dax's expressions were
filled with pity these days.  *What the hell, what do I have to lose?*
She took a deep breath and began to talk.

        Two hours later, she was still talking, only now she was
relating a humorous story of how Odo had apprehended a couple of Deltan
criminals.  Odo watched her face with joy. He'd really missed just
watching her.  Her whole face lit up with expression when she spoke.  He
was also delighted to hear some of her impressions of him.  He'd had no
idea she saw him that way, why he almost sounded invincible.
        He drew his thoughts back to the present as she took on a sad
expression and her eyes filled with moisture.  He quickly handed her a
napkin and she roughly brushed away the offending tears.
"Sorry...sometimes it just hits me...and I realize he's gone."
        Odo impulsively reached out an clasped her hand gently.  "That's
okay.  It's really hard to loose someone you care about like that.  I
know.  I lost someone I loved very much once, and it was all I could do
just to continue living.  I'm glad I did though...things have a way of
turning out alright."
        She sniffled twice and squeezed his hand once before letting it
go.  "Thanks for listening to me babble on like that.  Most of my
friends have decided I'm on the verge of mental breakdown and they offer
all sorts of 'helpful' advice."  She smiled weakly and then stared at
the data crystal in her hand for a long moment.  "I'm not going to find
anything on this am I?"  She took in a shaky breath.  "He really is dead
and I'm just chasing shadows."
        Odo grasped both hands this time and forced her to look him in
the eye.  "From what you've said, I really don't think there's any
chance."  He paused trying to find the right words.  "I'm sure he would
have appreciated your vigilance, but perhaps now a better tribute to him
would be to just let him go.  From what you've told me, I'm sure that's
what he would've wanted."
        A couple of tears rolled down again and she wiped them away
absently.  "I suppose you're right."  She said softly.  They sat
silently for a few more minutes and then finally, Kira cleared her
throat, stood and faced him with an almost normal expression. "I think I
actually feel a little bit better.  Thank you for listening."
        He stood also and smiled.  "It was my pleasure.  It isn't often
I get the company of a lovely lady."
        Kira blushed a little at the compliment.  "Well...thank you...um
listen, I can pay you now if you like.  Anyone who'd listen to me drone
on for two hours isn't likely to have cheated me."
        Odo shook his head.  "That's not necessary.  It didn't cause me
any trouble and I'd feel like a Ferengi if I took your money."
        Kira stared at him, surprised.  "No, I fully intended to pay you
for this.  I can't let you just...give it to me..."
        Odo shook his head again.  "Please, Major.  That woman I told
you about?  The one I loved? Well, I let her down and I was never able
to make it up to her.  Doing this for you would make me feel a little
better."
        Kira opened her mouth to protest, but after a moment simply
closed it and smiled.  "Okay...if you insist."  She smiled again and
moved to walk away, but he caught her arm again.
        "There is one thing you could do for payment though."  She
looked back at him, suspiciously and he continued.  "Promise me that if
you feel the need to look further, that you will come to me for help
before you do anything risky.  I have connections that might be able to
make things easier."
        Her face relaxed and she touched his arm gently.  "Okay, okay.
I promise."  She laughed a little.  "Who are you anyway?  One of those
guardian angles in Terran Fairy tales?"
        He feigned ignorance.  "Who?"
        She laughed again.  "Never mind. Just don't get caught having
lunch with the station's Doctor.  He forces you to read Terran
literature."
        Odo chuckled in return and watched as Kira left the bar.  Once
she was out of sight he allowed a big smile to cross his face for a
moment, then realizing where he was, quickly left and headed for a
secluded portion of the Promenade.
        He hadn't felt this good in months!  Sure he 'Odo' wasn't in her
good graces but at least he could spend some time with her.  He hadn't
expected to ever do that again.  And this was SO much easier than it was
when he was the Constable.  He could be as open and friendly as he
wanted to and no one would think a thing of it.  He had no 'reputation'
to maintain or limit him.  It was very refreshing.
        He forced himself to calm down.  He had to be careful.  If he
got too close, someone would eventually see through him and he couldn't
let that happen.  No.  He'd just see her from time to time and enjoy his
new found anonymity.
        He looked at the cronometer on the wall.  It was late, but he
was too happy to go back to his quarters yet.  Instead he moved towards
the engine room and his favorite thinking place.  This was definitely an
evening worth thinking about.


Two Months Later...

        Dax scowled at the readout in front of her.  "I just don't
understand.  I've tried everything I can think of and it still isn't
working.  These computer glitches are driving me crazy."
        "Try kicking it, it always seems to work for Miles."  Kira said
over her shoulder with a smirk.
        Dax glared back.  "Ha ha, very funny.  I don't suppose you'd
like to take a try at this?"
        Kira struck her most intimidating, superior officer pose.
"Excuse me, Commander, but I have more important things to do."
        Dax rolled her eyes.  "Oh please, you were sending messages to
Keiko, helping her plan Kirayoshi's birthday party.  I saw you."
        Kira smiled and crossed her arms.  "Like I said, more important
things to do."
        Dax just growled in response, then hauled off and kicked her
console, followed by a resounding "Ouch!"  Kira moved to look at the
screen as Dax massaged her damaged foot.  "Hummm, no better.  Maybe you
have to be Irish or something."  She chuckled for a moment and then
quickly moved away as she caught a murderous glare from Dax.  "I just
remembered something I have to do...I'll back in a little while.  You
have Ops, Commander."
        Kira managed to control her laughter until she could no longer
hear the Trill's grumbling, then allowed herself to enjoy the moment.
The turbo lift deposited her on the docking ring and she immediately
headed for docking bay three.
        She saw him the moment she entered the bay.  He was directing a
team of Bajorans loading freight onto a Klingon ship.  The room was too
warm, too noisy and too small, but it still brought a smile to her face.
He smiled back briefly, and then shoved a crate into the hands of a
Klingon crew member, following it with an intimidating glare.  Kira
turned to the repair crew fixing the bay door controls.
        "Did you find the problem yet, Chief?"
        The Irish engineer grunted in frustration.  "No, and I pretty
sure it's related to all the other computer failures we've been having
lately."  He stood and wiped his brow with a rag.  "Nothing is
catastrophic, just annoying.  It's almost like we've lost a small
percentage of all systems, but not enough of any one to do any real
damage.  If this is some sort of sabotage, I'd like to meet the person
who designed it.  They'd have to be a genius."
        Kira only half listened as she covertly watched Ital order the
other dock workers around.  He was really good at his job, and his team
was easily the best on the station.  She frowned a little as he moved
out of sight and was about to move to get a better view when...
"Major?"
        She started.  "Um...what?  I'm sorry Chief, I drifted off there
for a moment.  What did you say?"
        O'Brien eyed her suspiciously, glancing over to where she'd been
staring and seeing nothing.  "I asked if you were attending the
Admiral's ball?  Keiko wanted to know if you were going to wear that
green shawl or scarf or something. I was supposed to ask you about it."
        Kira nodded.  "I don't think I have much of a choice.  Sisko
made it one of his 'personal requests'."  She smiled at him.  "And yes,
Keiko can borrow my scarf.  She did give it to me after all."
        O'Brien smiled.  "She is rather fond of it, but she already has
so many of her own the only way she could justify spending that much on
it was to buy it as a present"  He rolled his eyes with his standard
'I'll never understand women expression.'
        Kira laughed.  "We women have to stick together, why do you
think I gave her that sweater last year?"
        O'Brien grunted and moved back to his tools.  "What are you
doing down here anyway?  Aren't you on shift in Ops?"
        Kira glanced back over at the dock workers trying to catch sight
of him again, but he was still inside the ship.  "Oh, no good reason.  I
teased Dax one too many times and decided it was a good time for a
break."
        O'Brien snorted.  "You are a brave woman, Kira Nerys."
        Kira checked one more time.  No luck.  "Well, I'd better be
getting back.  I'm sure she's calmed down by now."   O'Brien's only
response was as short wave as he returned to cursing at the door
controls.  Kira made it all the way to the other door when Ital finally
came back into view.  She caught his eye one more time and favored him
with a friendly smile.  He smiled back and she turned to leave, walking
right into a stack of boxes next to the door.  One of the technicians
steadied the stack as she made a hasty retreat, her face bright red.
*What's gotten into me?  I'm acting like a teenager!*
        She moved slowly along the corridor, taking the long way back to
Ops.  It gave her time to reflect on her feelings for Ital.  Since that
night in Quark's they'd started talking to each other on a regular
basis.  At first it was mostly accidental. They'd see each other here or
there, and stop to exchange pleasantries.  Eventually they began to
count on seeing each other at certain places at certain times and by
unspoken agreement, spent a few hours each evening playing Bajoran chess
in the back of Quark's.  No one saw them in the small alcove and it was
quite private.
        The chess games weren't nearly as entertaining as the
discussions.  Never in her life had she spent so much time just talking
with someone...well except for perhaps, Odo.  But that was always so one
sided.  He never shared any feelings of his own.  Ital was thoughtful,
well educated and had a dry sense of humor.  She loved the way his eyes
sparkled whenever he teased her about something.
        She really couldn't explain her reaction.  Sure, Ital was
pleasant looking, but he wasn't what you'd call gorgeous.  Handsome, in
his own way, and definitely masculine, but not really attractive.  Even
so, she felt a rush of energy serge through her when ever she saw him.
She loved the way his hands moved, the way he smiled and the gentle way
he laughed at her stupid jokes.
        She really knew very little about his background.  He told her
of his isolated childhood, and his feelings of confusion during the
Occupation.  Little by little she was piecing it all together.  He also
told her of the woman he'd loved.   She must have been something
special, the way he spoke of her.  She worried about that a little,
afraid that no one would ever measure up to such a perfect ghost.  When
she'd mentioned that to him, he smiled and said that the same could be
said of her friend Odo.  They'd had a long talk that night about what it
felt like to let go of someone you loved and lost, and it had helped her
put a lot of emotions into focus.
        That was probably the best thing about Ital.  He made her feel
like she had a future to look forward to.  It was nice to have someone
that had been through the same types of things and understood what it
felt like.  All her Star Fleet friends were great people, and they were
very important to her, but none of them really understood the kind of
hell she'd lived through.  Ital did, and that made all the difference.
        They hadn't become romantically involved yet, but deep down she
knew they were heading that way.  There was an electricity between them
that wouldn't be denied forever.  It scared her a little, she really
wasn't sure what she wanted, and that was a big step. She already felt
more for Ital than she ever had for any other man she'd dated, including
Bariel.  She'd never allowed herself to get emotionally involved this
deeply.  But the overwhelming fact was that he made her feel alive, and
happy for probably the first time in her life.   That she couldn't
ignore.
        A crew member passed by her in the corridor stopping to stare as
she passed.  Being so deep in thought, Kira didn't even notice when he
stopped to look back at her quizzically.  *I wonder what's making her so
happy?  I don't think I've ever seen her smile like that.*  After a
pause he shrugged, and moved on.  After all he supposed.  Even senior
officer's must have feelings sometimes.

        Odo sat in the small domed room starring out at the stars.  This
small alcove near the top of the central core, was the best kept secret
on the station.  It was quiet, isolated and very beautiful.  Covered in
glass, it almost made you feel as if you were sitting in space itself.
The effect was quite inspiring.
        He had discovered this place shortly after he came to Terok Nor
those many years ago, and had used it as a salvation from the stress
since then.  He'd never shared it with anyone until last month.  One
night he'd surprised Nerys by showing her his 'hideout.'  She'd laughed
at him and accused him of trying to 'get her in the mood.'   He heartily
denied it and they both had a good laugh before spending the rest of the
evening quietly talking and watching the stars.  It had been one of the
best nights of his life.
        Waiting here for her now, he forced the thread of fear that
pushed it's way up away.  He knew he was playing a dangerous game with
this.  He should have kept his distance. Should have stayed away, but he
just couldn't help himself.  If anything he loved her more now than he
had before.  Her presence was as vital to him as breathing.
        And it was so much easier this way.  He could share himself with
her like he never felt comfortable doing before.  Then he'd been that
freak, alien, shapeshifter who'd worked for the Cardassians.  He was
nothing she'd have taken seriously.  But now, he was just another
Bajoran who'd been wounded by the Occupation.  He was allowed to have
the same feelings she did.
        He'd had to use some really creative thinking to create a past
for himself that was, one not traceable, and two true.  Nothing he'd
told her was a lie, it was just not exactly correct.  It was semantics
he knew, but he didn't have another choice.  He needed her.
        "Hey, what makes you think you can hog all the space?"
        Odo smiled back at the woman he loved as she maneuvered her way
inside the tight little room, pushing him back over onto what she had
proclaimed 'his side.'  Finally she flopped down into a reclined
position, and sighed.  "I've been looking forward to this all day.  You
have no idea how hectic it was in Ops."
        Odo smiled again and turned on his side to gaze at her.  "So
what's the problem this time?"
        Nerys groaned.  "More computer problems.  Trust me, you don't
want to hear about it.  How were the docks?"
        "Same as always." He shrugged.  "Terral did drop a crate on his
toe though and I learned a few new Andorian curses.  Care to hear a
few?"
        Nerys laughed and turned to face him too.  "Later, right now, I
have an offer for you."
        He raised an eyebrow suggestively, and she swatted him
playfully.  "Nothing like that, I just wanted to ask if you go to a
dance with me."
        His face lost all expression and Nerys sat up a little more,
surprised at the reaction.  "Well, you don't have to, if you don't want
to."
        She looked away and Odo rubbed her arm in a reassurance, as he
fought down his panic.  "It's not that I don't want to go with you,
Nerys.  I just don't think it's a good idea."
        She looked at him quizzically.  "Why not?"
        "People will see us together."
        Kira looked even more exasperated.  "So? You don't want to be
seen with me?"  She pulled her arm away and he moved closer pulling her
chin back to face him.
        "I would love to be seen with you, I'd be the most envied man on
the station."  She started to protest again and he silenced her with a
gentle finger on her lips.  "But, you need to be careful who people
associate you with, in your position."
        "My position? Ital, I'm not a politician!  I don't care what
anyone thinks..."
        "I know you don't, but you should.  Bajor joins the Federation
in two weeks and you become part of Star Fleet. You've worked really
hard passing all their 'transition' courses and still they're uncertain
about the 'volatile' Bajoran contingent.  Sisko will be transferred to
another post soon, and if you want to play the game with all your new
Star Fleet comrades, you have to be better than they are.  Do you think
they'll give the command of  DS9 to an officer that didn't go to the
academy, and associates with the more questionable elements of society?"
        Kira rolled her eyes at him.  "You are not part of a
'questionable element of society'."
        Odo smiled and actually brushed his lips across the hand he
held.  "You may know that, but they don't.  To them, I'm just one of the
many dock workers that often has ties to the criminal element."  He cut
her off as she began to protest again.  "I just think it's better if we
don't flaunt our relat...friendship in front of them, that's all."
        Kira eyed him for a moment then she smiled, slyly.  "You just
don't want to get dressed up."
        Odo laughed and held up his hands in defeat.  "Okay, you found
me out.  I really don't like parties."
        Kira smiled at him again and moved so that she was leaning her
back against his chest as they watched the stars in silence some more.
Finally, she spoke, her voice very soft.  "If Star Fleet made me choose
between them and you, you know I'd pick you."
        Odo resumed caressing her arms as he chuckled.  "And deliver a
series of speeches, full of righteous indignation, I'm sure."
        She swatted his hand and laughed too.  "You know me too well
already.  I'm not sure it's safe to spend this much time with you."
        Odo gave a belated laugh and hoped she hadn't caught the
hesitation.  "Too bad, I won't take no for an answer anymore."
        Kira just chuckled and leaned her head back against his
shoulder, starting to doze.  Odo observed her reflection in the glass
across from them as she drifted off.  *So beautiful.*  He continued to
stroke her arms for a while enjoying the peace.  Tomorrow be damned.
He'd worry about it when it got here.


COMMENTS????





"A Rose, by any other Name..."
By Heather Romberg

        Kira tugged on her dress one more time.  It wouldn't lay right
and she was becoming annoyed. *Prophets, I hate this sort of party.*
One final look at her appearance and she decided to just ignore it.  She
was late to the ball as it was and the sooner she got there, the sooner
she could leave.  She was not looking forward to this.

        Dax sipped her punch, lazily watching the crowd assembled on the
transformed Promenade.  It was hard to believe that this was the same
place she walked through every day.  The Admiral had spared no expense
at making this affair grand.  He considered Bajor's admission to the
Federation, one of the most important events he'd ever had a hand in, so
he wanted to make the most of it.
        The place was jammed with dignitaries from the Federation, Bajor
and Star Fleet and there were probably as many security officers as
attendees.  The war front was not that close anymore, but it still had
everyone jumpy.  By joining the Federation now, Bajor had ensured
protection from Star Fleet, but stretched the size of  the territory to
be protected.  Star Fleet wanted to reassure Bajor that it would live up
to it's word.
        Dax didn't care though.  She was simply going to enjoy herself
tonight.  The signing ceremony tomorrow would be incredibly dull in
comparison.  She glanced over at her new husband, and gave him a
suggestive smile, then laughed as he pointedly looked away and
readjusted his collar.  Sometimes he was really a prude. *Hummm...I'll
have to do something about that.*
        She started to make her way over to Worf when she saw Kira exit
a turbo lift near Quark's.  Changing her mind she headed over to talk to
her friend.  Kira had greatly improved over the past few months since
Odo'd died, and Dax was finally starting to think she'd be okay.  She
was still reclusive and spent most of her free time isolated from the
rest of her friends, but there wasn't that sense of hopelessness about
her anymore.
        In fact, Dax had almost started to wonder if she had started
seeing someone new.  The psychological turnabout was almost too quick
for the depth of despair she'd been suffering.  She was still the same
old Kira though.  Dax had had to twist her arm to convince her to wear
something other than her dress uniform tonight. Civilian dress was
authorized, and that didn't happen often.
        She smiled as she saw the way the dress she'd picked out for
Kira accented her natural beauty.  She smiled even wider at the look of
discomfort on Kira's face.  This was definitely not her style of
clothing.  *Well, it's about time.*
        Kira saw her and motioned her over.  "I don't why you talked me
into this, Jadzia.  This dress is so revealing, I might as well be
naked."
        Dax laughed and adjusted one of the sleeves.  "Nonsense, Nerys.
It looks wonderful.  See?  I told you this cut would be very
flattering."  She smiled, devilishly.  "Besides, it wasn't Jadzia that
wanted you to wear this dress, it was Dax."
        Kira looked at her stunned, then she finally began to laugh, a
little color in her cheeks.  "I swear, Dax, I sometimes forget what a
leach you are.  What would Worf think if he heard you say something like
that."
        Dax waved it off with hand.  "Oh Jadzia has firm control in that
area, but nobody can stop Dax from admiring."
        Kira smiled again, more relaxed now.  "Have you seen the
Captain, or the O'Briens?"
        Dax shook her head.  "No, sorry.  I think Benjamin and Kassidy
are around here somewhere though."  She paused for a moment as both
women scanned the crowd for people they knew.  "So did you finally break
down and ask someone to come with you?"
        Kira rolled her eyes.  "No.  And quit asking me that.  I'm not
interested in any of your castoffs, thank you."
        "Okay, but you don't know what you're missing.  A mindless fling
would do you some good.  Just enjoy yourself for once."  Kira was about
to launch into another 'I'm not like that' speech when she felt a warm
hand on her shoulder.
        "I think Nerys is more discriminating in taste than that.  I,
for one, have always liked that about her."
        Kira faced the man behind her and turned a huge smile his way.
"Edon!  I'm so glad to see you!  I didn't expect to be able to find
anyone in this crowd."
                Shakaar wrapped her up in a bear hug as Dax smiled on
the pair.  Finally, they broke apart.  "I was looking for you.  It's
been a long time since we saw each other."  He shrugged.  "I miss you."
        Kira smiled and kissed him on the cheek.  "I've missed you too,
Edon."  They shared a short moment of warmth before Edon reached out to
shake Dax's hand.
"How are you, Jadzia?  Same old trouble maker. I see."
        Dax laughed and returned his hand shake vigorously. "Can't help
myself.  How've you been, Minister?"
        Shakaar grimaced.  "Busy.  Sometimes I wish I could go back to
being a farmer.  Dawn to dusk in a field sounds like a vacation now."
        They all chuckled a little until Shakaar noticed someone
approaching them.  "Damn, that's Councilmen Gref'gor. He won't leave me
alone and all he wants to talk about is trade policy with Andor.  Quick,
Nerys.  Dance with me."
        Kira was unable to reply as Shakaar pulled her into what was a
modified, Tellerite waltz.  She'd never been that good at dancing to
begin with and this dance was somewhat complicated.  Fortunately, it was
short and Shakaar only had to drag her around for a few minutes.  As the
dance ended, he pulled her into a small, secluded corner, gazing at her
with emotion.  "It's really good to see you again, Nerys."  He smiled
warmly and caressed her shoulders.  "I really must compliment your
tailor.  You look unbelievably beautiful tonight."
        Kira was starting to feel trapped.  It was obvious what Edon
wanted, and the closeness was a little intoxicating.  After all, they
had been lovers and Edon was an exceptionally good looking man.  Even
so, this was definitely not what she wanted.  She wanted, with
increasing fervor, another man.  Numerous frustrated nights were not
helping her resolve at this moment though.
        Finally, after a long minute of considering the possibility, she
gently pulled herself away from him.  "Don't think I'm not tempted,
Edon, but we both know it's not a good idea."
Shakaar's face fell in disappointment.  "I was hoping that a little time
apart might have changed your mind."
        Kira clasped his hands tightly.  "I'm sorry, really I am.  But I
can't pretend to feel something I don't.  I cherish your friendship more
than you can know and we've been through so much together, but..."
        Shakaar swallowed hard.  "I'm sorry you feel that way, Nerys.  I
think we'd be great together.  After our past, who else'll put up with
us?"
        Kira sighed in sorrow. This conversation was going too much like
the last conversation they'd had.  "We both deserve more than that,
Edon."
        Shakaar bit his tongue, restraining himself from telling her she
was chasing childish dreams.  It would only make things worse.  He
squeezed her hands back once then let them go.  "If you're sure, then
there's little I can do to change your mind.  I learned that when you
were twelve."  He finished with a weak smile.
        She started to speak again, but he placed a finger on her lips
to stop her.  "Don't say anything.  We'll just let it go."  He sighed
and moved to leave with a shrug.  "I'd better mingle, votes you know."
With that he left her alone.
        Kira leaned back against the wall in frustration.  *Why can't I
ever get these things right?  Is there something wrong with me?*
        "Hey there, you okay?"  Kira smiled as she saw Dax peak around
the corner.  "I just saw Shakaar leave."
        Kira sighed again and the two women rejoined the rest of the
party.  "He wanted a little more than I can give."
        Dax nodded knowingly.  "Thought it was something like that."
She handed Kira a tall blue drink.  "Here, this'll take the edge off."
Kira accepted it.  She was in no mood to argue tonight.

        Two hours later, She was beginning to wonder if the evening
would ever end.  So far she'd talked with all the command staff and
their families, most of the Chamber of Ministers, three reporters, two
stuffy scientists (one of whom kept putting his hands in inappropriate
places) and a slew of Federation Council members.  She wasn't even sure
who they were, and the small talk was starting to really grate on her
nerves.
        She'd moved over to lean against a wall near Quarks, hoping to
blend in with the background when she felt a hand on her elbow.  "If you
wanted to be left alone, you should never have worn such a beautiful
dress."
        Kira smiled as she was unceremoniously pulled into an alcove
behind Quark's.  "You!  You said you weren't coming."
Ital stood back and presented himself, arms out.  Kira laughed with
delight.  "You look wonderful!  Where did you get that suit?"
        Ital smiled playfully as he pulled her into his arms to dance,
slowly.  "I have my secrets."  He nuzzled her neck.  "I couldn't allow
you to spend the entire evening alone.  Besides, I missed you."
        Kira wrapped both arms around his neck and returned the nuzzle,
feeling less playful by the moment.  "You have no idea how good it is to
see you.  This has to be the most boring ball on record."
        Odo tightened his grip around her waist, running his hands along
her bare back, intoxicated by the warmth of her skin.  Neither spoke for
a while as they enjoyed the intensity of feeling that continued to grow
with each passing sway.
        Kira ran her fingers through the hair on the back of his neck
and his caresses became bolder as her breath quickened.  Odo tried to
hold back, to regain some perspective.  This wasn't what he'd come here
tonight for.  He'd simply wanted to see her and make her laugh for a few
minutes.  But, this was rapidly getting out of hand.
        *Prophets, she's beautiful.*  All of his senses were on
overload.  It almost felt like linking, the same mind numbing pleasure
and fulfillment.  He had almost gathered the strength to push her away,
when he felt her begin to lightly kiss his neck, and then his ear.
        He groaned and they both gave up the illusion of dancing, as he
responded in kind.  After a few short moments their lips met in a deep,
passionate kiss.  It was overwhelming.  He was consumed and gave up
trying to restrain himself, deepening the kiss even further.
        After several long moments, their lips parted as Nerys gasped
for air, her eyes never leaving his.  He gasped too at the expression he
saw there.  Never had he hoped to see her look at him that way and he
knew life would never be the same for him after this.
        Kira was the first to speak, her voice shaking. "Well, I guess I
have my answer."
        Not really concentrating on her words, Odo returned to nibbling
on her throat.  "What answer?"
        Kira moaned and moved her head back allowing him better access.
"I was wondering if I was right to hold out for a man I could really
love.  I'm glad I did."
        Odo stopped in mid-nibble and straightened to face her.  *This
is wrong.*  Kira noticed the change immediately.  "Did I say something
wrong?"  Terror covered her face.  "Did I misinterpret your feelings?
        "No! No, of course not."  Odo said as he pulled her into a tight
embrace.  "I love you more than you can possibly imagine."
        Kira pulled back to face him, her fear fading.  "They why did
you react like that?"
        He sighed.  "It's...there're things about me that you don't
know...things..."  He trailed off, not knowing what to say.  He knew
what he should say, but he simply couldn't gather the courage.  Not with
her here, standing in his arms, her lips swollen from his kisses.
        Kira smiled a little and kissed him again.  "Of course there
are.  There are things you don't know about me too.  Part of the fun is
learning about each other."  With that she kissed him deeply, pushing
all coherent thought from his mind.
        "Hey!  This area is for employees only!  Go back to your room or
something."
        They parted quickly as Quark shouted at them, embarrassed.
Quark thought them to be strangers and was shocked as he saw Kira turn
to face him.  "Uh...Major!  I had no idea it was you..."  He supposed he
should have apologized, but he was to surprised to speak.  This was
definitely not expected.  And who was the man, anyway?  He looked like
one of the dock men that hung out at the bar, but he was too dressed up.
        Kira regained her composure first.  "Sorry, Quark, we'll be
leaving."  With that she dragged a silent Odo out of the bar and to a
near by turbo lift.  When the doors closed, she surprised him again, by
pressing him up against the wall and kissing him hard.  After the
surprise faded (quickly!) he felt himself being drawn into the passion
again. He had to stop this!
        Pushing her away was the hardest thing he'd ever done in his
life, bar none. She looked equally upset.  He stepped away.  "I think we
need to slow down a little, Nerys.  As much as I don't want to, I think
it's for the best."
        Kira was exasperated.  That was supposed to be her line, and she
didn't like being on the receiving end.  "You're kidding right?  Ital, I
can tell you want me as much as I want you.  Why on Bajor should we
wait?"
        Odo looked at her, his face a picture of agony.  "I know this is
hard to understand, but trust me, Nerys.  We need to wait.  Please, if
you love me, let's call it a night."
        Kira was confused, a little angry and VERY frustrated.  But she
could see the seriousness in his expression.  "Okay.  If that's what you
want.  But..."
        Odo cut her off with a short but intimate kiss and clasped her
shoulders.  "I assure you this is NOT what I want.  But, it's for the
best."
        The lift stopped at her floor, and she stepped out, uncertainty
plain on her face.  "I'll see you tomorrow?"  He nodded, painfully and
the lift doors shut, separating them.


COMMENTS????



"A Rose, by any other Name..."
By Heather Romberg

        Odo reformed his humanoid body slowly.  He had not rested well
at all and he felt terrible.  He was angry, mostly at himself, but also
at her for not loving him as he was before, at the Founders, the
Federation and the Universe in general.  A small part of him was also
angry that after all those years of longing to be close with her, he
couldn't enjoy it when it finally happened.
        He'd spent most of the night trying to come up with a solution
to the problem.  He ran through every excuse and justification for his
subterfuge, but he knew she'd accept none of it.  If she found out, it
was over.
        That was the worst part.  She would find out.  It was
inevitable.  He'd learned many things from linking with the other
Changeling, such as eating and imitating bodily fluids and such, but
eventually, he'd slip up.  Especially if he allowed her to come closer
into his life.
        Being with her was just so damn intoxicating!  He'd wanted it
for so long, he'd allowed himself to be drawn into an increasingly
twisted web.  He knew better.  He'd even arrested criminals for such
lapses in judgment.
        After grimly checking his appearance one last time he left his
small, box like quarters for work, his mind still clearly occupied.
*What am I going to do?*

        Kira awoke that same morning in an equally sour mood.  She
rolled out of bed and staggered into the shower.  She hadn't slept well
either, second guessing every thing she'd thought to be true about her
relationship with Ital.  She was also plagued by the nagging fear and
insecurity that always seemed to crop up when ever she started to get
close to someone.
        The only person she'd never felt afraid to be really open with
was Odo and no matter how hard she tried to keep his memory in the past,
it never worked.  The loss and need for him returned at the worst
moments.  Like now.
        She sighed and leaned against the wall, allowing the water to
run over her, happy that the computer in her washroom was working this
morning.  She needed to wash away the unpleasant thoughts.
        Last night she'd really believed that she loved Ital more than
anyone she'd ever loved, including Odo. They were so much alike that
sometimes it scared her.  When she'd first started seeing Ital, she'd
assumed that she was drawn to him because of the resemblance.  Oh, not
physically or anything, just...the way he did things, the way he thought
and the way he looked at her.  They were exactly the same.
        Yet, Ital was better in many ways too.  He was much more open
and honest about his feelings. He was also playful and warm most of the
time.  Odo had spent so many years creating a hard, unapproachable
persona for himself, he rarely let anyone see the real man.
        She choked back an approaching sob. *Oh Odo, why didn't you let
me in?*  Finally, disgusted with herself for sitting around worrying,
she roughly exited the shower and completed her morning rituals.  She'd
just have to deal with this later.

        Odo walked to Quark's during the lunch break.  He couldn't
decide if he wanted to see her yet or not, but something compelled him
to go.  *What's that Terran expression, 'Like a moth to the flame?'*  He
scowled.  She wasn't there.
        Sighing in a combination of frustration and relief he turned to
walk away.
        "You there!  I want to talk to you!"
        Odo turned as he heard Quark shout after him.  He'd almost
forgotten that the little snake had seen him with Kira last night.  He
sighed again and followed the Ferengi into the storage room next to the
bar.  *Wonder how he'll try to profit from this?*  He thought
sarcastically.  "What do you want?  I have to get back to work."
        Quark just starred at him for a long moment before speaking.
"Who are you, really?"
        Odo's internal alarm went off and his insides started to shiver.
"Well the hell are you talking about, Ferengi?"  Maybe he could scare
him off.
        Quark held up a data rod.  "You know what this is?"  At Odo's
silent glare he continued.  "It's all the records on a man named Dren
Ital.  There are far too few of them and they are faked."
        Deciding to stay the course, Odo moved forward trying to
intimidate him further with his height.  "What gives you the right to
poke around in my records, troll?"
        Instead of the expected cringe, Quark's face broke into a huge
grin and he threw his arms around Odo's arms in a huge bear hug. "It
really is you!  I'd know that expression anywhere."
        Odo grimaced as he realized he was caught.  Quark may be a
criminal, but he wasn't stupid.  After a long moment, he tried to shrug
the smaller man off.  "Let go Quark.  You're starting to annoy me."
        Quark let go, and faced him with a slightly lesser grin. "I knew
you weren't dead.  It was too convenient and you'd never go out that
way."
        Odo sat down wearily on a nearby crate. "How'd you figure it
out?"
        Quark grinned even wider.  "I didn't really until you used the
Constable look on me.  But I suspected after I found all your records
were faked using one of my personal techniques." He smirked, devilishly.
"Really Odo, I'm flattered that you learned something from me."  He
shrugged.  "Besides, you have the power to do it.  You are a
shapeshifter after all."
        Odo snorted followed by a low growl.  "Why were you checking my
records anyway?"
        Quark sat down next to him.  "I was curious about the man that
was kissing the Major last night."  Odo looked at him, suspiciously and
Quark replied indignantly.  "Hey, you're not the only person who likes
her.  I don't want her to get involved with the wrong sort, especially
since she's been so upset lately.  You certainly didn't appear to be of
her caliber."
        Odo snorted again.  "Your show of concern is touching."  He
sourly added.
        "Well, don't take it personally!   You're the one who's
masquerading as a seedy  dock worker."
        Odo looked at him, affronted.  "Seedy?  I was never seedy.
Just..."
        Quark waved his explanation off.  "Oh don't worry about it.  It
wasn't you anyway."  The devilish smile returned and he elbowed Odo in
the ribs.  "So you finally got her, eh?  How long are the two of you
going to keep this game up?  Are you undercover or something?"
        Odo looked back at him, a shamed look coming over his face.
"No.  Everyone thinks I'm dead...including Kira."
        Quark's smile faded into a frown.  "You mean Kira really thinks
you're that dock worker?"  Odo nodded and Quark stood to pace, finally
turning to face Odo again.  "And you say, I'm disreputable!  That's a
cruel thing to do.  Do you have any idea how upset she was when you
died?  Bashir had her on a suicide watch for a while."  Odo looked up
for a moment at that.  He'd had no idea she'd been that far gone.
        Finally he stammered a response.  "You have no idea what it was
like...besides she didn't love me then as a man, just as one of her few
'living' friends. I didn't plan this, it just sort of...evolved."
        Quark shook his head in disgust.  "You're a fool, Odo.  That
woman loved you, it was plain to everyone that knew her.  You don't get
that messed up over a friend."  He paused and glared in earnest.  "And
now you're going to hurt her some more?  Did you really think you could
keep this from her?"
        Odo stood and faced him, a pleading look on his face.  Having
the thoughts that cursed him every night spit back at him was taking a
toll.  "Of course not!  I meant to stay away, but I had to make sure she
was okay first.  Then when I saw her she was so upset, she even hired me
to do an illegal search.  I couldn't leave her like that!
Later...things just got out of hand."  He sat back down, the energy
leaving him as the truth settled around him.  "You're right.  I am
terrible for having done this.  I just wanted to be with her so much and
this was so much easier...I..."
        Quark sighed and sat down too.  "You have to tell her, Odo.
Now.  Before it gets any worse."
        Odo nodded, he no longer had the strength to talk.  Quark had
pity on him and shrugged.  "Maybe she'll be so happy to see you, she'll
just forgive you?"
        Odo gave a halfhearted shadow of his normal snort.  Quark shook
his head and moved to leave.  "You need to face who you are Odo, allow
people to forgive you and move on.  It's the only way."  He paused and
stood directly in front of Odo.  "Just make me one promise.  Don't run
away again."
        Odo looked up sharply, his eyes betraying his pain.  "I won't
leave...unless she asks me too."
        Quark nodded.  "I'll hold you to that, Constable."  With that he
left the store room, leaving Odo to contemplate his options.

        Kira punched the button one more time.  "DAMN IT!  Chief this
terminal isn't working now.  We cannot go on like this!  We're starting
to lose primary systems and people are going to get hurt if this get any
worse.  Either you fix it now, or call in a specialist who can!"
        O'Brien moved back a little at the raw anger of his superior
officer, then shored up his backbone.  "I've done the best I can,
*Major*, perhaps you have a solution you haven't shared with the rest of
us."
        Kira stepped closer until she was facing him eye to eye, inches
separating them. Her face was solid stone.  "Do I need to remind you who
I am, Mister?  That was not a request.  Now either you carry out your
orders or we'll take this to the Captain.  IS THAT CLEAR?"
        Rarely did Kira jack one of the crew up, but it was always
spectacular when she did.  This was no exception.  O'Brien's face turned
red with rage and embarrassment, but he had little choice.  "Yes sir."
He managed to include as much sarcasm in that one phrase to get him
decked.  Fortunately for him, Kira didn't take the bait and he moved
away before she could change her mind.
        Dax stepped over to her, cautiously.  Kira heard her approach
and growled without turning around.  "Is there something you wanted to
add, Commander?"
        Dax stopped in her tracks and backed off.  Now was obviously not
the time.  Rebuffed she returned to her station and scowled at her
equally malfunctioning terminal.  She hated being treated like a
subordinate.  Being over 300 years old did that to you.  And even though
she and Kira were both technically the same rank, Kira was her superior
in position.  Plus she was due to be promoted to full Commander sometime
after the signing ceremony . Then she would have both rank and position.
        Jadzia forced Dax's irritation down and made herself busy as
Kira continued to rampage through the technical staff.   Realistically
she knew that this sort of shakeup was needed.  The computer problems
were almost becoming routine, and the crew lacked energy to find the
cause.  She grimaced as Kira ordered the second shift back on duty to
run new diagnostics.  It was going to be a long afternoon.

        Five hours later they were all haggard and frustrated.  Two of
the four shifts had been on duty for over seven hours and the third had
just joined them.  Based on Kira's expression, there was no end in
sight.  She stepped up to Dax.  "Report, Commander."
        Dax put on her most military face.  "Same as the last time,
Major.  No defects.  All systems normal, except that they won't work at
random intervals."
        Kira sighed and leaned forward on the terminal one hand rubbing
her eyes.  Finally she stood up straight and called O'Brien over, her
voice back to normal mode.  "We have to find the problem, Chief.  I
almost lost docking controls this morning.  If that happens again, we
could lose an entire pylon.  If normal procedures aren't working, give
me some abnormal ones."
        O'Brien sighed, clearly frustrated.  He'd long ago forgiven her
for snapping at him as he saw the increased energy of the crew, but he
was still tired.  "I wish I had some to give you, Major, but I've simply
run out of ideas.  Maybe we should call Star Fleet for a complete
overhaul."
        Kira shook her head sharply.  "No time.  We have Bajor's
entrance to the Federation ceremony tonight.  The last thing we need is
to have something go wrong.  I thought you had this fixed last week?
Why did it reappear now?  There may be a connection."
        Dax cocked her head to one side in concentration.  She was
right. This was a bad time for the station's systems to be on the blink.
Also until yesterday, all the malfunctions had been to non-vital
systems, annoying, but easily set on the back burner.  "You may have
something there, Nerys.  But I think it's a little elaborate for a
terrorist plot or something.  Maybe we should inform the Captain though,
just in case."
        Kira nodded.  "You go down and pull him away personally.  I
don't want any of the other dignitaries getting wind of this."
        Dax nodded and left as Kira and O'Brien discussed increasingly
outlandish options.

        Dax entered Quark's bar, having passed the owner on the
Promenade.  He was talking intently to one of the dock workers. In fact,
it was the same dock worker, she'd seen Kira talk to sometimes.  She
made a mental note to bug him about it later.  Looking around at the
familiar bar, amazed at the transformation.  The place almost looked
respectable.  Sisko was holding an informal cocktail hour for the
visiting dignitaries.  It had the virtue of being big enough and easy to
secure, even if it was a little inappropriate.
        She located Sisko right away and motioned him over to the door.
He nodded to his companions and came over.  "Something wrong?"
        Dax smiled and tried to look as casual as possible.  "We've been
having some more problems with the computers, only now it's affecting
the primary systems too."
        Sisko looked a little alarmed.  "Has there been any damage?"
        Dax shook her head and suddenly everything went black.  There
were numerous shouts of fear and the noise of people trying to move
without hitting anything, when Sisko's voice broke through the din.
"Please, everyone stay where you are.  This will be cleared up as soon
as possible.  I'm sorry for the inconvenience."
        Dax tapped him on the shoulder and whispered in his ear.
"Benjamin, my comm badge isn't working and the door is locked and
covered with a force field."
        She could feel Sisko's nervousness in the dark.  "Then we're
trapped in here.

        Kira slammed her hands down on the console again.  "How many
power relays did we lose?"
        All but two."  Came the shouted answer as the emergency lighting
kicked in."
        Kira swallowed several curses as she made her decision.
"Alright, I'm going to treat this like an attack and who ever is doing
it is using the computer.  Shut down all computer systems except
weapons.  We'll operate manually.  All personal to emergency stations,
issue personal weapons, manually lock down all ships and set up the
portable generators.  I need to know what the hell is going on.  Section
heads report status."
        The finely oiled crew launched into action and soon had the
primary systems functional at least manually.  Reports came as they
isolated problem areas.  "Commander Worf, status of the delegations?"
        Worf looked at her grimly. "I was just about to come see you.
They were all at Sisko's party in Quark's.  There is no power in that
section and it has no life support."
        Kira shuddered.  "The entire section is cut off?"
        Worf's face looked even more grim.  "No, only the bar."
        An ensign crawled up a turbo lift shaft and ran over.  "Sir
there's a force field blocking all the doors and the accessible bulk
heads.  The Chief can't get in and we have to get them out of there
before they run out of air."
        Kira's face turned white for a moment.  "Worf, I need you and
security to clear this station of any hostile presence.  I'll join
O'Brien and work on the life support problem.  Go!"
        They all ran to their respective tasks.  Time was running out.

        Quark banged on the outside wall of his bar in frustration.  It
already felt colder than the rest of the station.  "Who is doing this?
They're going to kill all the delegates from both the Federation and
Bajor."
        Odo stepped up next to him and pulled him out of the way of the
repair crews as he had been since the power went out.  "If I had to
guess, I'd say the Cardassians. They don't want Bajor to join the
Federation.  It destroys any hope they have of isolating Bajor and the
wormhole in the future."
        Quark looked at him, surprised.  "Well, yes, but killing the
entire delegation, won't stop them, it'll just make them mad."
        Odo shrugged.  "Maybe they're desperate, and they don't have any
other options.  I don't know!  I've been out of touch for a while,
remember."
        Quark groaned and reached out to his bar again.  "My poor
business.  This'll ruin me.  Who's going to want to go to a bar a
hundred people died in?"
        Odo started rolled his eyes in disgust but was quickly
distracted when he saw a flash of red in the dim emergency lighting.  Of
course she'd be here.  He moved more into the shadows, not prepared to
deal with this now.
        "I can't break through the force fields, Major.  They have
individual power sources protected by the shields themselves.  This is
sophisticated.  Whoever did it knew all the nooks and crannies of the
station's bulk head design."
        Kira grimaced.  "Cardassians.  Damn them!"
        O'Brien looked up from his work momentarily.  "Maybe.  If it was
them, they'll have used a phase converter somewhere to modulate the
fields.  It couldn't be covered by one of the shields or it wouldn't
work.  If we can find it, maybe...I've got it!  Holy Mother, Damn them!"
        Kira looked at him anxiously.  "Where is it?"
        O'Brien tossed his tricorder to the deck in frustration.  "It's
stuck inside the bulkhead seam fourteen meters up.  There's no way to
get inside something that narrow without a transporter, and I don't have
enough power to even turn one on."
        Kira forced herself to refrain from kicking something.  "Well,
we'll just have to try anyway, Chief.  They start to die in ten
minutes!"
        Quark looked over at Odo expectantly.  "You could do that
couldn't you?"
        Odo frowned.  He wasn't sure, but there was a good chance he
could. Before he could answer, Bashir stepped over to Kira.  "I'm
showing diminishing life signs for a couple of the delegates.  Some of
them are too old to take this sort to strain."
        Odo sighed.  He had no choice, and at least this made the
question of how to tell her moot.  He walked up to Kira.
        "Major, I may be able to help."
        Kira's face relaxed a fraction as she saw him.  "I appreciate
the offer, Ital, but we're short of time here."
        He took a deep breath.  "I'm sorry you have to find out this
way, but I'm not Dren Ital. That's just an alias I took after I left
here."
        Kira faced him fully now, he had her attention. He took her hand
and looked at her intently.  "Always believe this.  I love you, now and
forever, Nerys."
        With that he allowed his hand to lose shape and cover hers in
molten silk for a brief moment before dissolving completely and shooting
up the side of the bulk head to reach inside.  After a few long moments
O'Brien let out a war woop of success as the force fields began to drop
and his men began tearing at the bulkheads with a vengeance, oblivious
to Quark's repeated complaints.
        Moments later Odo reformed, this time with his old...no, real
appearance, and the delegated were quickly moved to safety.

Comments???



"A Rose, by any other Name..."
By Heather Romberg

        Two days later the station was still in disarray, but
functional.  The delegates, after being checked out medically and
treated if needed, insisted on holding the signing ceremony as planned.
There was no way either side was going to allow the Cardassians to delay
the joining.  They performed the ceremony by emergency lighting and an
impressive array of candles provided by the local Bajoran Temple.
        The emergency earlier in the day only served to solidify and
focus the good will among the delegates and station personnel alike.  It
really brought home the importance of this accomplishment and easily
overshadowed any fear produced by the Cardassian attack.
        Kira was given particular credit for having acted so diligently
when trying to locate the computer problem, anticipating the threat to
the delegations, as well as her command decision to shut down the main
computer.  The Cardassians had planed a series of computer failures that
would finally culminate in disaster during the signing ceremony itself.
They were supposed to be gradual and diverse enough to prevent too much
suspicion.
        Unfortunately for them, when Kira began her intensive
investigation so close to the event, they were forced to proceed ahead
of schedule.  Her shut down of the main computer prevented their fail
safes and backup programs from kicking in, as well as prevented their
escape.  Worf apprehended the operatives with relative ease.
        In recognition of her effort, the head of Star Fleet Command
swore her in as a full Commander in Star Fleet immediately after the
ceremony followed by much celebrating and good feelings on all
sides...well almost all...

        Kira glanced down at her arm, still surprised to see the black
fabric.  The new uniform felt strange, adding to her sense of
dislocation.  After an obligatory appearance at the celebratory parties,
she'd thrown herself into her work.  It was the only thing that kept her
from collapsing in confusion, hurt and joy.
        *He's alive.*  She'd almost given up hope, and had finally been
able to make it through the day without seeing him everywhere she
looked.  She'd started to put him behind her.  *How could I have given
up so easily?*
        Her guilty feelings were intermixed with intense anger at him
for deceiving her and for letting her go through all that torment.  She
was also hurt that he obviously didn't trust her enough to be honest,
and that was perhaps what bothered her the most.
        The terminal in front of her announced another check-in by one
of the patrolling starships and she absently answered it.
        She hadn't spoken to him since 'the incident.'  He'd simply
gazed forelonely into her eyes for a long minute as the crew rushed to
rescue people all around them, then turned a walked away, leaving her
with hundreds of questions a heart torn in two.
        She'd almost followed him right then, but O'Brien had grabbed
her arm and she was dragged back into the pandemonium.  Dax and Bashir
hunted him down after the emergency was over and said he was very
unresponsive to any of their questions, so they'd allowed him his
space...for a little while anyway.
        Since then most of the command crew had tried to get him to talk
about what happened, why he'd left and then returned, but he never
really answered.  Oh, he was polite of course, but it was clear that he
wanted to remain in his little room, alone.
        The one person who hadn't talked to him was the only one who
mattered.  But she was too numb and confused to know what to say, so she
hid, there in Ops, where she didn't have to think.

        Odo sat at the small table in his room staring at it's surface.
He'd regenerated more in the past two days than he had in a month.  In
fact if it hadn't been for the frequent interruptions by the crew...no,
his friends...he'd have stayed shapeless the entire time.
        They meant well, and it did give him some satisfaction to know
that people still cared about him.  But she was the only person he
really needed and he'd ruined that. The knock at the door took him by
surprise, startling him out of his reverie.
        He sighed.  It was probably Dax again.  Damn, she was
persistent.  "Come."
        Shakaar entered the room slowly, clearly cautious.  "Constable,
it's good to see you again.  I thought we'd lost you."
        Odo stood and faced the other man, surprised.  The First
Minister of Bajor was the last person he'd expected to walk through his
door.  "Thank you, Minister.  What can I do for you?"  He motioned him
to the other chair at the table and they both sat.
        Shakaar observed him carefully. He knew what Odo's 'death' had
done to Nerys and had drawn several conclusions based on that.  He'd
seen her deal with the death of family members and lovers numerous
times, but never had she reacted as strongly.  There was something
special about the man before him, and he wanted to know what it was.
"Actually, I came here to thank you."  At Odo's confused expression, he
added.  "For saving our lives."  He grinned.  "Mine in particular."
        "Ah, that..."  Odo shrugged.  "You're welcome."  He really
wished Shakaar would leave, intense curiosity emanated from the man.
        Shakaar continued.  "I'm planning to award you the medal of
freedom for this, Odo.  You deserve it."
        Odo looked a little surprised at that, then his face turned into
a frown.  "I would really appreciate it if you didn't.  I'd rather just
let the incident fade away."
        Shakaar let out a short laugh.  "Fade away?  That's just not
going to happen, Constable.  You were instrumental in saving not only
the entire Council of Ministers, but most of Star Fleet Command and the
Federation Council.  The news sources on dozens of worlds are still
singing your praises, and you've imprinted yourself permanently on
Bajoran history.  There's no going back now."
        Odo sighed in frustration.  "I really don't want any attention.
Please, just let me be alone."
        Shakaar frowned.  "I really don't understand, Odo.  Why do you
want to isolate yourself so much?  I mean you even faked your own death!
If people want to show how much they admire you or care for you, what's
the harm?"
        Odo felt anger push forward.  "I really don't think you of all
people could understand.  This is who I am.  Don't expect me to act like
you."
        Shakaar sighed heavily, realizing he wasn't going to get
anywhere.  "I'm sorry you feel that way, Constable.  I know you see me
as just a politician, but I was a leader of soldiers much longer.  I
know when someone is hurting, and is pushing everyone away to avoid
getting hurt again.  Without fail, that approach always made the person
more miserable." His face hardened and became much more formal.  "So for
your own good, I'm not going to let you off the hook.  I'm going to give
you that medal whether you want it or not.  You are going to accept it
graciously and be pleasant when your friends congratulate you.  You are
also going to see a counselor until *he* thinks you are well.  If you
don't comply, I might take action against you for deserting your post
under fire when the Dominion was here."
        Odo glared at him when he said that, but Shakaar just held up
his hand. "I really don't want to do that, Odo.  I just need to make
sure you follow my instructions.  You *need* to get out of here and
start living again."  He stood and walked to the door but turned back
for one more comment.
        "I'll talk to Sisko about getting your old job back.  Since you
left our arrest percentage has gone down dramatically."  He paused and
made sure Odo was looking at him.  "One final thing.  You hurt Nerys
very badly when you 'died.'  If you run off and hurt her again, you'll
have to answer to me.  And don't be fooled by these fancy suits I wear
now.  I've been a terrorist most of my life and I assure you I don't
make idle threats."
        He nodded curtly to Odo as the door opened for him.  "Welcome
home, Constable."
        Odo sat still for a long moment gaining control of his temper.
*How dare he threaten me!*   Angrily he picked up a nearby padd and
threw it against the wall.  He mentally walked through all the nasty
things he could do to get back at Shakaar.  But quickly lost the rage
and gave up on the childish train of thought.  *That's two people who
won't let me leave.  I guess I don't have much choice.*


        Kira watched as Shakaar awarded Odo the medal of freedom.  It
was a great honor.  Star Fleet, not wanting to be outdone, offered him a
commission as a Lieutenant Commander and the position as security
officer on the station.  She suspected Shakaar had a hand in that too,
but he wouldn't say.
        She starred at the man she'd believed to be dead as the people
around her applauded his actions, unable to applaud herself.  Prophets
she'd loved him.  Both of him.  But how on Bajor was she supposed to
combine the two.  It almost felt as if she'd lost Ital entirely and she
missed him terribly.
        Plus, the Odo who stood before her was a shadow of the man who'd
been her friend and life line in the long months of the Dominion
Occupation...until the end.  So in many ways, she'd lost both of them.
With that thought, the issues she'd been ignoring for the past several
days pushed forward with full force.
        Her stomach rebelled at the deluge and she was afraid for a
moment that she might be sick so great was her anguish.  No matter how
hard she tried, she always ended up alone.  Unable to maintain the
facade any longer, she moved to leave the Promenade and seek some
privacy.  She made it as far as turbo lift before her knees buckled and
she was forced to lean against the wall for support, no longer caring
who saw her.
Quark saw her leave the award ceremony with concern.  She'd been far to
detached from all this and he was certain she'd blow eventually.  It was
the way she did things, unfortunately.  He grimaced as he realized it
was something she had in common with another 'friend' of his.  *Idiots.*
        Quark pulled her back up moments after she'd slumped and dragged
her into the bar, settling her into a secluded booth.  He motioned a
waiter to bring something from his private stock, and made her drink.
        "Drink up, Maj...uh, Commander.  It'll help."
        She drank a little, coughed and then leaned her lead back
against the rest, her eyes closed.
        Quark muttered a Ferengi curse to himself.  This was driving him
crazy. Where was the profit in helping these two fools?  *I've spent
entirely too much time away from home if this is what I worry about.*
Sighing, he decided he wasn't going to be free of it until it was fixed.
"Have you talked to him?"
        She didn't open her eyes, but shook her head.
        "Well you *have* to. It's the only way either of you are going
to get over this and frankly it's starting to get annoying.  At this
rate you two will chase away all my customers with this cloud of
depression hanging over you.  Talk to him Kira!"
        She shook her head sharply, a few tears slipping free of her
lashes.  Quark threw up his hands in frustration.  "He's the same person
he always was!  The only difference is that as the dock worker, he could
allow himself to let go and be open with you."
        Kira finally opened her eyes, her expression pleading.  "Why?
Why couldn't he be himself before?  Is there something wrong with me?
Did I do something to him?"
        Quark shook his head.  "No, no.  You didn't do anything to him.
He was like that when he got here, cold, distant, suspicious...lonely.
People expected him to be that way, so he was. You were the first person
who ever made a dent in that shield he keeps up.  When he became someone
else, he could be what he wanted to be, without any old expectations."
        He grinned at her suggestively.  "And don't tell me you didn't
like him that way. I saw the way you were kissing him that night."
        Kira groaned, but couldn't summon the strength to be angry.
"How can he love me if he doesn't trust me enough to be himself?  He
needed to create an entirely new persona just to be with me."
        Quark sighed. "You may not have talked to him yet, but I have.
He didn't plan on getting involved with you.  He was going to stay away
entirely, but he had to come back and make sure you were okay.  Then you
hired him to do something, and he kept getting drawn further and further
in.  It wasn't until later that he realized how much easier it was to be
close to you that way, and by then he was enjoying it so much he
couldn't bring himself to stop."
        Quark leaned forward intently.  "He feels terrible about this,
and if anything is more depressed than you are.  I have never seen any
two people who are so much in love.  Yet you've hidden it from
yourselves so long you don't know how to do anything else.  Where's the
profit in being miserable?  Admit it.  You found being with the Dock-Odo
much easier than Constable-Odo too.   He's the same man but you gave the
'new persona' much more response than you ever gave the old Odo.  What's
he supposed to think?  That he had to change himself to get you to love
him?  That he wasn't good enough the way he was?  Well, I assure you,
Kira.  That's what he thinks."
        Quark leaned back to catch his breath.  Kira sat still, with her
head bowed, not willing to face what he'd said.  "Go talk to him, Nerys.
Be the one to take the first step for once."  He stood looking down at
her.  "And do it now, before you two really start to annoy me with your
foolishness.  Remember Rule of Acquisition number 545.  'Being silent
about your desires is never profitable.'"
        With that he left her to finish her drink and decide how much
courage she really had.


        Odo rechecked his appearance in the mirror and sighed in
frustration.  It was hard trying to get the Star Fleet uniform just
right.  There were so many parts that had to match specific colors and
such.  He really didn't want to do it, but it kept his mind off of other
more dangerous issues.  He started as the door chimed.
        "Come."
        Kira moved slowly just inside the door and stopped as it closed
behind her.  If Odo had a heart it would have been in his throat, as it
was, his internal substance trembled.  He'd made the decision earlier,
that if she chose to see him he wouldn't hide behind formality with her
as he always had before.  This time he'd let her see the real Odo, no
matter what she came said.  "Nerys."  His voice was soft and
unconsciously sensuous, causing  a shiver to run up Nerys's form.
        She took a deep breath and finally met his eyes.  "Odo..."  Her
voice trailed off as she became enthralled by his features.  She'd
missed him so much.  There'd been nights when she'd have given her soul
to see him again, even for a moment.  Now here he was and she couldn't
even find the words to talk to him.
        His heart (metaphysically speaking, of course) broke at the
sight of the pain in her eyes.  He'd never meant to cause her harm, and
he swore to himself at that moment to never do it again. He stepped
closer, hoping to make her feel better, but unable to decide how to do
that.
        That one step was all that was needed to push Nerys over the
edge.  She closed the remaining distance between them and flung herself
on him, her arms forming a vice grip around his chest.
        Odo almost fell backwards he was so surprised.  That was the
last thing he'd expected her to do.  After a moments hesitation, he
returned the embrace with the same fervor, burring his face in her neck
and caressing her hair.  He felt her tears on his shoulder and tightened
his grip even further.
        They stayed that way for a full five minutes, before Nerys
pulled back to look at him.  She swallowed hard.  "I...don't know what
to say, Odo.  I'm hurt, angry, scarred and deliriously happy all at the
same time."  He reached up to caress her cheek, wiping a tear away.  She
caught his eyes, intently.  "I need you to be honest with me Odo, no
holding back, and I'll do the same."
        He nodded and led her over to the small sofa, sitting so they
were still touching.  "I promise, Nerys.  No more hiding.  I can't stand
it anymore either."  He clasped both of her hands and kissed them.  "The
first thing you need to know, is that I love you.  I will always love
you."  He kissed her fingers again, and she sighed with pleasure, before
thinking better of it, and slowly pulled her hands away.  She didn't
need to be distracted right now.
        "How can you love me if you don't feel you can be yourself with
me?"
        He shook his head in negation.  "No, it's not like that at all.
You are the only person I *do* feel comfortable being myself with.  I
just...I didn't know how to until I could get past my reputation and
just do what felt right.  I *never* intended to hurt you, or lie to you.
It just kept getting more and more complicated and I was terrified that
if I told you, you'd really hate me."  He sighed.  "It was stupid, I
know.  I just was so intoxicated by living out all my fantasies, I
couldn't bring myself to end it."
        Nerys reached out and touched his cheek briefly.  "I understand.
I don't like it, but I understand it."  Her tears began to fall again,
slowly.  "All that stuff about your childhood and..."
        Odo jumped in.  "All true, Nerys.  I mean I may have used some
humanoid metaphors, here and there, but all those things really did
happen to me.   You can't know how good it was to finally share that
with someone."  He brushed away more tears and she leaned into his side
a little more.
        "I...wish you'd told me those things before.  It would have made
you much more...accessible."
        He nodded.  "I wish I had too."
        They were silent for a long moment.  Finally, Kira's tears began
to fall harder and she moved completely into his arms, releasing days of
pent up emotions.  Odo just held her, caressing her back murmuring
soothing words.
        Finally, she pulled back and looked at him again.  "You smell
the same."
        "I do?"
        She laughed a little.  "Yes, I could never figure out who Ital
smelled like.  I was so familiar with it, but I couldn't place it."  She
took a shaky breath.  "Now I know."
        He smiled a little, uncertain.  "Um...is that a good thing?"
        Nerys hugged him again tightly.  "Oh, yes it's a wonderful
thing.  I always loved Ital's scent.  It made me feel...safe, and warm."
        Odo returned the hug, unbelievably happy that this was
happening, but still worried.  He cleared his throat.  "I guess I should
also tell you that Ital really is my name."
        Nerys pulled back, shocked.  He continued, eyes downcast.  "I
was labeled 'unknown sample' by the Bajoran scientists.  The Cardassians
overseers translated that into the Cardassian word, 'nothing,' or
Odoital.  The scientists thought it was funny to break it into two
names, like a Bajoran."  He shrugged, trying to hide his pain.  "I don't
use the 'Ital' any more."
        Nerys moved close again, offering comfort for what was obviously
still painful.  "Damn Cardassians."
        "I started using it again when I left here.   To remind me who I
was.  I didn't want to completely forget."
        Nerys gave him a tight squeeze and then pulled back.  "I'm very
confused about a lot of things right now Odo, but I am certain about one
thing, and that is that I don't ever want to loose you again."
        Odo shut his eyes in relief.  "I'll won't go anywhere, I
promise."
        She smiled softly and moved both of them so they were almost
inclined on the sofa, his arms around her from behind.  "Lets just stay
like this for a little while.  I don't think I'm ready for more
revelations tonight.  We'll deal with that tomorrow."
        Odo nuzzled her ear and held her tightly.  "I've never heard a
better idea in my life."



There is an epilogue to follow...when I finish writing it and if I get
some comments!.  :-)



"A Rose, by any other Name..."
By Heather Romberg

EPILOGE

        "Wait a minute, let me get the lights..."  Kira said as she
fumbled along the wall for a light switch.  "Damnit, I wish Jenaea had
installed voice commands here...OUCH!  #%^&*%$!"
        "What happened, Nerys?  Are you alright?"  Odo asked anxiously
from the door.
        <grumble>  "Yes, I'm fine. Just stubbed my foot."  As she said
'foot' the Odo found the light switch and flipped it on.  He looked down
upon the woman he loved as she sat on the floor cradling her damaged
appendage, an annoyed look on her face.  It was at times like these that
Odo appreciated his ability to avoid visible emotional reactions as
amusement ran through him.
        She glared back at him, daring him to laugh.  He shoved all
humorous thoughts aside and knelt to massage her foot.  She sighed as
his hands melted a little.  "That feels...much better, Odo.  Where did
you learn to massage like that?"  She smiled and held up a hand.  "No,
wait, I'm not sure I want to know."
        Odo chuckled as the two of them continued to lounge on the floor
of what appeared to be a kitchen.  He glanced around.  "This is a big
kitchen."
        Kira opened her eyes and noticing where they were slowly got to
her feet.  She smiled as he gracefully rose as well.  "You think this is
big, wait till you see the rest of the house."
        They gathered their belongings and moved into the main living
area.  She as right.  It was huge.  The furnishings were mostly antiques
and had obviously created with great care.  There was a long central
hall with doors that branched into other rooms and a long stair case
leading upstairs to what he presumed were the bedrooms.
He hesitated as he stood there, holding luggage.  He *thought* they were
going to share one room, or at least he hoped they were, but he didn't
want to be presumptuous.
Kira had been glancing in all the rooms when she saw him stop at the
base of the stairs, obviously uncertain.  She moved over to embrace him
tightly from behind.  "Hey, I thought I'd made my intentions pretty
clear when I invited you to come on vacation with me, sweetheart."
        Odo sighed in pleasure and dropped the bags as he turned to wrap
his arms around her as well, enjoying a long hug.  After a moment he
chuckled.  "Perhaps, I need some convincing..."
        Kira laughed warmly, stepping away and lightly slapping his
shoulder.  "Not yet, Constable.  I'd like to get settled first, if you
don't mind."
        Odo made a face of impatience and tried to take her in his arms
again.  "Mind?  Well actually..."
        Kira laughed again, gave him a quick kiss and shoved one of the
bags into his outstretched arms before leading him upstairs to what had
to be the master bedroom.  It was done in rich, classical Bajoran colors
and fabrics, with a huge, plush, bed dominating all other features.
        As Nerys began unpacking, Odo sat on the edge of the bed a
marveled that he was actually there.  Following those initial days after
the Federation signing ceremony, he'd never expected to be this close to
Nerys.  He'd have been happy just for her to be civil with him.
        But after that first night when she'd come to him, and slept in
his arms, things had improved beyond even his dreams.  Their friends had
allowed them the time and privacy they needed to explore the issues
hanging between them. It had been a daunting task, but both had been so
dedicated to resolving things, it took far less time than it could have.

        The depth of love she showed him now still made his substance
tingle.  He'd never expected for her to return his feelings so fully,
especially, once she got to really know him.  Yet to his utter
amazement, the more she knew about him, the more she loved him.  It was
very similar to what he'd felt with her when was pretending to be Ital,
but so much better.  This time there was no aching quilt to overshadow
his joy, or stories to keep straight.  They were simply two people
sharing parts of themselves, no hesitation, no walls.  It was glorious.
        Nerys entered the wash room to put away her toiletry items,
smiling to herself.  She could sense what Odo was thinking about and she
couldn't blame him.  The sheer fact that they were there together was
mind boggling to her too.  Once she'd allowed herself to see Odo as both
'her Odo' and 'Ital,' she realized that he was what she'd been seeking
her whole life.  He was the other half of her soul and there was nothing
more important to her anymore.
        She reentered the bed room and moved to sit next to him on the
bed, clasping his hand gently.  "A little overwhelming, huh?"
        Odo let go of her hand and wrapped his arm around her shoulders
tightly, his face covered with a warm smile.  "Some...I suppose I keep
expecting the illusion to shatter."
        Kira moved so she could hold him tightly and began to lightly
kiss his neck, speaking between kisses.  "Don't...you...ever
worry...about that, sweetheart.  I may be...slow to commit...to
something completely, but once I do,...you'll never get rid of me."
        Odo chucked and began to return her caresses, his senses on
overload.  Until now, they'd both been hesitant to jump into a full
physical relationship, and by unspoken agreement, had limited themselves
to heated kisses and cuddling.  It had been *very* frustrating and Odo
wasn't sure how much longer he could hold himself back.
        Fortunately, Kira was having the same difficulty and showed no
signs of withdrawal.  After a few minutes of kissing though, Kira pulled
back to catch her breath, looking deeply into his eyes.  "I love you,
Odo.  I don't ever want to be without you."  She whispered, her voice
husky.
        Odo's substance trembled with joy as it did every time she said
that to him and he gave up any last restraint, pulling her with him into
the center of the bed, his lips showing her how much he reciprocated her
feelings.
        Hours later, she slept.   Odo cradled an exhausted Nerys in his
arms as he contemplated joy he'd never imagined possible.  In the
silence, he made a silent prayer of thanks to the Prophets, almost
convinced that such a gift could only have been granted by something
divine.  Even Changelings have their limits though, and eventually,
Odo's shape dissolved and he wrapped his lover into a warm, soft cocoon.

        The dawn went completely unnoticed as they slept/regenerated in
complete peace...it was the first of many such nights, and the beginning
of a bond stronger than both of them, and never to be broken.